Life Update: I quit school (again), but this time to pursue my dreams.

Pursue my Dreams

I quit school, to pursue my dreams.

There’s no clickbait, it’s true, I quit school (again) to pursue my dreams. And in this post I want to elaborate on my life update. I haven’t found the time to write this update post and honestly, I was a bit restless as well.
In the title I say ‘again’, so I will go into that a bit before I go back to the present – for the people who do not know (it’s in dutch).

The text will continue throughout this post, in-between images. So, let’s continue & read on!

Dropping out of High School

When I was 18 (I’m 22 now), I struggled with depression and decided to drop out of high school. This was VERY unlike me, because I loved school and it came fairly easy to me (which had always been a blessing, because the school system is fucked up and there are a lot of people who do not fit in it). But, alas, I also fell out of that boat. I had always wanted to further my studies and get into higher education, which I really was passionate about. I had wanted to study Astronomy since I was 15, because I wanted to become an astronaut. But after discovering that physics was not my strong suit, I decided to study Chemistry (this was my favorite subject in school).
Long story short; I started battling with depression although my life was great. Nothing traumatic happened and honestly, nothing out of the ordinary was really going on. After some time of this, I decided I needed to get out of my head and stop putting pressure on myself. I quit literally EVERYTHING; sports (basketball), side job, social contact & school. I then went on to study a 2-year program in Fashion Design, where I could work with my hands a LOT. It was the best decision I have ever made regarding to my depression, and I believe it is one of the things that had gotten me to slow down and heal.

Pursue my Dreams

Studying

After my short fashion design track I had a feeling of wanting to continue my studies. I have always loved anything school or study related, so this was not something I pressured myself into. For a moment I thought about going to art school to pursue costume designing (for theater and film), but I soon felt myself drawn to science again. There was something left unsaid between me and science, after I dropped out of high school and let go of the dream of becoming an Astronaut. So, I picked that dream back up and looked at my options. Because I did not have my high school VWO diploma, I could not go to university. What I could do, was go to HBO (A University of Applied Science), so I decided to go that route. After making a detour – with pit stops at degrees such as; Creative Business & Entrepreneurship – I ended up at a science degree that consisted of Microbiology, Chemistry, (Chemical) Engineering, Physics, Maths & Statistics. And, I loved it. I actually really, really, really enjoyed it.

Pursue my Dreams

Consistent Passion(s)

But, what I did not tell you yet, is that I continued reading & writing my book(s) and creating content at ALL times. I have been creating content (blogging) since I turned 13 (!!!) and I have done it throughout all of my teen years. I switched from Fashion Blogging, to Lifestyle blogging & Books.
What I also did not tell you is that when I was really depressed, I found out about Personal Development, Spirituality & Mindset. I was sucked into the world of Manifestation and all things spiritual.
All of these things resulted in me having a passion that had never, ever left my side. At the end of the short Fashion Design program I decided I wanted to start and run my own company. Of course, at the time I wanted to do it in combination with studying full time. This is rather like me, taking too much on my plate at once because I am so freaking ambitious. It’s overwhelming sometimes, I assure you, to pursue my dreams.

Pursue my Dreams

Officially Quitting

As I already told you, I was loving the science degree. But as time went on it proved to be challenging. Not the degree – but combining the full-time degree with my passions and business. I love writing, being creative and delving into spirituality. And during my time studying science, I did not have a lot of time to do this.
I let the idea of quitting to pursue my dreams marinate inside my brain, because it was way to scary to truly think about it. Britt is a person that studies – that should study and make a contribution in a field that not enough women make a contribution in. I wanted to pave a way and be a badass scientist – maybe even an astronaut. I am cut out for the job and I felt like just because I could, I should.
But, life isn’t about this ‘prove yourself’ tactic and sooner or later the truth will catch up. And it did, with me. At the time I felt so much sadness for not being able to do what I actually wanted to do, that I made the decision out of exhaustion instead of boldness. The week after however, I got so many anxiety attacks, that I did need to be bold. I wanted to crawl back into my safe space and felt like I was mourning the loss of a good friend. It was an experience that made me grow, to be sure.

Pursue my Dreams

The Present

Right now, I have been exactly 2 months out of school. I have had many moments of doubt creep over me; doubt about whether what I want would even succeed. The beliefs about the succes I wanted and knew I could get were always so freaking strong, but when I was faced with them head on I shivered. It’s so easy to look at something from a distance, instead of having to face it yourself. Perspective literally morphs.
I do still think about pursuing degrees one way or another – in a part-time form of course – because I love studying and I love structure in a sense. Science also never leaves my brain and I still love to interact with it in a fun way, not in a way in which I have to “prove” anything. BUT, I also know that these options will stay open to me for as long as I live – so the possibility is ALWAYS there. I do not have to study now, I never have to study. But if I want to, I know I can!

But, very long story short, I have quit my full-time degree – and I’m keeping myself from ever trying to pursue another full-time degree again. Part-time, yes, this might be an option – as my time currently is filled a lot with thinking about it and how much fun studying actually is. But I will never put my writing and other passions to the side line ever again. So yeah, let’s keep it at that for now.

Oh no, wait, I still need to tell you about the dreams I am pursuing!

Pursue my Dreams

The Dreams I am Pursuing

The reason I gave up studying is more elaborate than ‘building my business’. What I want to do is;

  • Be a published AND bestselling author (#1 if I could have my way – and I can 😉). And someday, I would love to adapt my books into movies, series or animations. Let’s just put it at New Dam (my company) becoming a sort of Disney-like company.
  • Help (millions of) people all over the world (with spirituality/mindset or something else entirely, as long as I help).
  • Have the freedom to travel whenever I want to and structure my own days + decide what I want to do.
  • Help organizations, causes and people to pursue their goals and dreams and contribute to further the things I strongly encourage, such as; equality, diversity, inclusivity, access to education, the environment and so much more!

And listen to my new Podcast Episode about why you SHOULD pursue your Dreams!

Lots of Love,

Britt

You can also follow me on Instagram.

Follow:
0
Britt van den Elzen

Hi! I’m Britt and I am a 20-something creative entrepreneur from the Netherlands. I love all things magic, especially in fiction. I have been reading and watching stories ever since I can remember, and it is the greatest passion of my life! ✨

Find me on: Web | Instagram

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

error: Content is protected!